07 5 / 2012
Ignoring the truth
2 weeks ago my mom told me that my granny is dying.
SN: Granny is my god-sister’s grandmom. I can’t remember a time in my life when I didn’t know Granny. She has always been there for me; at every birthday, school event, etc. She had beaten breast cancer years ago and unfortunately the cancer came back about a year and a half ago. At first, she was going through chemotherapy and then stopped recently because she didn’t like how she felt on chemo.
So when my mom told me that granny was dying 2 weeks ago, I thought she meant months. Then last week I was talking to my grandmom (my dad’s mom) and she was telling me that granny wasn’t doing well and that she in a lot of pain. So I called my mom and asked her how granny was and it’s not good at all. She’s days away from dying and I’m not there to see her. She isn’t taking phone calls because she doesn’t have the energy to speak. She is in hospice and she’s not even responding to her family any more.
I haven’t felt this much pain since my grandpop died four years ago. I know that I am going to be a hot mess at her funeral. I don’t do well with funerals especially when it is someone that I love. I really upset that she won’t be able to see me walk across the stage this weekend because I know she would be proud of me.
Im going to break down soon
22 4 / 2012
…
I’ll be home in 3 weeks… EXACTLY! That scares me considering I have been living on my own for 4 years. But hey I have to do what I have to do.
22 4 / 2012
Trust Issues
How can someone marry another person who they do not fully trust?? A friend of a friend is getting married to the mother of his child yet she does not trust him. I understand that a every person wants to create a family for their children and I do not object to that. However, I do not believe that just because you have a child together does not mean that you HAVE to marry each other.
When I get married, I will trust my husband and not have to worry about his every move. I will not call him every 5 minutes when he goes out with his friends. I will not object to a bachelor party because believe me I am going to go all out for my bachelorette party. I know that my husband will not do anything crazy to jeopardize our marriage and future together.
Just venting…
15 4 / 2012
"Some of us may fear what will happen if we sit still and stop working. But something worse happens when we refuse to rest. Without rest we cannot be spiritually or physically healthy. God heals while we rest"
